Myths & Misunderstandings
Myths and Misunderstandings-Frequently repeated inaccurate information Child Abusers are easy to recognize because they look dangerous, unclean, cruel and don’t fit in with the rest of society. Child abusers exist in all areas of society. In public, they may look and act like everyone else. They might be known as fun, caring, and nurturing individuals because they are skilled at making others accept them and their closeness to children. A child who provokes sexual abuse is getting what they asked for. A child is never responsible for a sexual act committed against them or in their presence by an adult. Adults are completely responsible for this type of situation. Only young girls are the victims of sexual abuse. Young boys are equally vulnerable to sexual abuse and exploitation. It is only homosexuals who abuse boys. Heterosexual males are more often the sexual abusers of young boys. Children who are abused by people who are the same sex as them become homosexuals as adults. Sex of sexual abuser has no relation to sexual orientation as an adult. Disabled children are rarely abused, especially since everyone feels sorry for them. Multiple studies have shown that children and adolescents with disabilities are increasingly becoming victim to abuse and maltreatment, most often by the family members or caretakers in their homes and by employees in residential facilities. These children are just as vulnerable to the impact of abuse in terms of mental health consequences. Children lie about sexual abuse. Children do not ordinarily have enough knowledge about sex to enable them to talk about it unless they have experienced it. There is not really that much abuse taking place. Society is against it and that keeps it from happening. The facts are, it is happening, much of it goes unreported. Society doesn’t like TALKING ABOUT IT, so it stays secret and untreated. In a family where there is incest, the non-offending mother is not aware of the abuse. About 60% of the mothers know that the abuse is happening. There are varying reasons for their inaction-including fear, lack of support, and lack of resources. If a person reports their spouse for sexually abusing their own child, the reporting parent will never see the child again. Police will take away the abuser, not the child. Reporting the abuser is the first step in getting help for the child and the family so that treatment and healing can take place and abuse stops. Children know that they are being abused and they will tell someone when they are ready. A child’s environment is the only one they know. If abuse starts early, the children take it as part of life, they don’t realize that everyone else’s family is not like that- that what is happening is abnormal or unacceptable. When they get older and realize it, they may not seek help out of confusion, shame, fear or denial. You can’t do anything about it. You can do something about it. You have within you a talent, skills, a feeling, empathy, a spiritual pull that can be helpful in some capacity to prevent child abuse and maltreatment in your community. There are ways to be interactive with families and children, there are ways to support local efforts that are not directly interactive, and there are needs for clerical works, fundraising, information distribution, and support activities, all ways that have great impact. Contact Prevent Child Abuse-Wayne at 427-0101 or pcawayne@waynehelp.com for more details.